I'm really tired of being around smokers

I feel like I'm at my tipping point. I've lived abroad for over 12 years without having too many smokers nearby and maybe I got a little too comfortable with it, despite previously having lived in a smoke-heavy country like Bulgaria. Ever since I moved back to Turkey, I've been surrounded by plumes of cigarette smoke. Even in my own apartment, I frequently have to close my windows because the cigarette smoke from outside seeps inside whenever someone's on a phone call outside. And it's not even ecigs or weed either, just straight up old school tar and arsenic all day every day.

So I've got one question for yall. Why are you guys still smoking? Seriously, we knew like 30-40 years ago that this shit was poison for your health. We know there are PhD researchers and lobbyists working around the clock in every country on Earth to make cigarettes as addictive as they possibly can. The goal is - as with all companies - to turn everyone into a customer. Every "casual smoker" who "only smokes in social settings" is money left on the table for executives. When you claim that you only smoke when you drink, you must be aware that there are kanban boards, email threads and focus groups dedicated to turn your social activity into a crippling addiction, right?

When I found out about some of this at age 7, I was like "yeah that seems like something I shouldn't try," and so I never did. Which in itself is shocking to many people I speak to for reasons I can't understand. Like I have to have a good reason why I'm not killing myself? And look, I get it okay. If you got into it as a teen, when your faculties were still developing and you were in mortal danger of making bad decisions, there's really not much you can do about it now and I'm sorry you had to grow up with those influences. But if you started smoking after your teens... what are you doing man? You're a grown ass adult.

I'm aware these feelings seem antithetical to my beliefs. I believe everyone has the right to do whatever they want to themselves no matter how stupid or dangerous. I also believe there's probably no free will. People are affected by their peers and environment, and that my choice to not smoke is as much a product of my environment and upbringing as is your choice to smoke. Though I like to pretend to live my life as if free will exists. I also understand that I'm not a paragon of health myself either, and maybe my eating habits are also harmful, yet I do so knowing the risks. The biggest difference for me is that you're not directly affected by my poor diet. Of course, many destructive habits harm those close to you, but when you smoke next to me, I'm basically also smoking against my will.

There's just something unspeakably infuriating about stepping out of Sabiha Gökçen airport in Istanbul and having to hold my breath while out in fresh air as I go through a disgusting miasma of toxic plume to avoid breathing it in, just because people are bored hanging out around the exit. I think some of my qualms are less personally against smokers, and more to do with the lack of smoking regulation enforcement here. If there were rules on a minimum distance to building entrances for smokers like there are in many other countries for example, I imagine this would affect me way less.

But it's also hard to not have personal feelings in some instances. I've spent the past 3 years watching my inlaws go from being "summer-only smokers" to becoming addicts who need a daily fix to function. I mean, what did they think was going to happen? What does "smoking only during the summer" even mean? I'm sorry to say this wasn't a "lack of willpower," it's the system functioning exactly as intended, and anyone who thinks otherwise is fooling themselves imo. Though maybe at age 50+ you don't care much about doing harmful things to your body to begin with.

I get that this entire spiel feels judgemental, way more than I intend it to be. And I genuinely understand that when a smoker simply has to start smoking when they're sitting next to me, most of them do so with - if not an apologetic attitude - certainly not with smugness. I realize that the wind just blows all the smoke directly in my face and clothes every single time, and they're not spewing it at me on purpose. All I can say is personally, my life was noticeably better when I didn't have to worry about all this and I'm looking forward to going back to that.